


No Judging

by Liralen



Category: Little Mix (Band), One Direction (Band)
Genre: Bisexuality, F/F, F/M, M/M, Polyamory, Power Dynamics, idk power dynamics is the best i can think of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-09
Updated: 2013-05-09
Packaged: 2017-12-10 21:13:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/790230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liralen/pseuds/Liralen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>she's not sure what it means that she's a different person with jade, that she wants things from her she's never wanted from zayn.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Judging

**Author's Note:**

> jotted this down in like half an hour after pondering power dynamics and dominance vs. submissiveness and how they aren't always established roles or traits, how they can vary between relationships. posted to tumblr @fromcainwithlove

"do you think you're a different person with different people?" perrie asks, running an idle thumb down the smooth slope of jade's inner thigh.

"don't know." perrie remains thoughtful, gaze soft and unfocused, and jade squirms. "if i say yes will you put your fingers in me?" jade asks finally, shifting her hips around with a frustrated little sound.

"don't move," perrie commands automatically, and then freezes, eyes widening. "oh god, i'm sorry! i didn't mean it like that, of course i will."

" _perrie_." jade's laughing. why is she laughing? perrie is a vile, bossy, no, _abusive_ creature and jade shouldn't stand for it, let alone _laugh_. "it's okay. you can tell me what to do. it's hot."

"it is?" perrie stares at jade, dumbstruck and confused (and turned on, yeah, really very turned on). jade who is so tiny and mousy and _smart_ , too smart for the lot of them, really. she's like zayn in that. there's other similarities, too, if perrie really wanted to look closely, but that's the one that stands out—how bloody brilliant they both are, not in any kind of showy way, both humble as mice, but their minds are quick and keen and they just amaze perrie, honestly. she doesn't know what either of them is doing with a silly girl like her, and she's not about to ask.

"it is," jade promises, "it's really—huh!—really kind, kind of…"

"keep going," perrie tells her innocently, slipping another finger into her and giving them both a wicked little twist. it makes jade whimper, and something in perrie wants to purr. "it's kind of…?"

"it's kind—kind uhhHHH—just, just tell me what you want me to say so you keep doing that!" jade breathes out in a rush, eyes squeezed shut tight against the slick wet sound of perrie's fingers working inside her.

perrie grins and kisses the inside of jade's knee, wrapping up her previous thoughts and putting them high up on a shelf for another time, a time when she doesn't have a lovely girl panting and begging on her fingers. "that's a good start."

*

"have you ever had something happen that made you question everything you thought about yourself?" she asks zayn on the phone that night.

his laugh is all the better for not really being much of a laugh; it's a zayn-laugh, a slow, dry chuckle broken up by the soft papery sound of a drag off a cigarette.

"feels like every other day," he jokes, but concern curls around his tone, tender and warm. "what happened, babe?"

she doesn't know how to say it, so she says it fast, like when she was a kid and she had to fess up to some minor crime, hoping if she rushed the words together her mum wouldn't understand and she could escape punishment: "i think i want to hold jade down and fuck her 'til she cries."

zayn's laugh is loud and full this time, startled. it makes her smile reflexively to hear it. "and is that a new revelation? kinda thought you'd established that awhile ago."

"yeah," she says, smiling a little fondly before frowning. "no, but. like. i want to—i want things i'm not used to? sometimes i'll just look at her, and she's so tiny, you know, so delicate, i could hold her down with one hand, and i just want to pick her up and—" she breaks off, embarrassed.

perrie's never considered herself submissive (zayn would probably never stop laughing if he heard the word applied to her). she's done plenty of holding down his skinny wrists, spent enough nights marking him up, biting purpling bruises across his chest. but still, she likes it—might even like it best—when he's on top of her, wrapped around her, outmuscling her despite his lanky frame and using all that wiry strength to fuck her senseless. he does this thing, sometimes, when he's so turned on he's kind of stupid with it, where he holds the back of her neck hard, tight enough to almost hurt, and it does it for her every time, makes her go tight and hot and yet pliant at the same time.

she'd had problems with it at first, this thing she'd discovered where she kind of liked it when a man overpowered her, because she was a liberated 21st century feminist, damn it, and she shouldn't _want_ that. but she did. she does. and it led to really good orgasms, and zayn still respected her in the morning (and adored and worshipped her), so she got over it. she figured that was just the kind of girl she was.

she doesn't feel that way with jade. at all. she's never wanted jade to hold her down or bite too hard or tell her when she can and can't touch herself. she wants. god. she looks at jade and she just wants to _take_. take everything, everything jade wants to give and then _more_.

"it's different than with you," she finishes lamely.

zayn's quiet for a long moment, just the faint damp sounds of his mouth on the cigarette to tell her they're still connected. "yeah," he says slowly, "i can understand that."

"is that—is that how it is with him?" perrie asks tentatively.

they don't talk about zayn's _whatever_ with louis, not really. it's not that it's a banned subject—there's nothing they're not allowed to ask each other, nothing they can't say to one another—it's just that perrie knows it's complicated, and it makes zayn a little sad, sometimes, and she doesn't like making him sad. he never brings it up, and unless she thinks something's happened to upset him she usually doesn't, either.

zayn lets out a slightly shaky breath. "sometimes," he murmurs. "it's, yeah. complicated. but babe, i don't think there's anything wrong with you, with wanting that. everyone's different, every… relationship is different, and it makes sense that you'd be a different person with her."

it mirrors so closely what she asked jade earlier that perrie is almost suspicious, has to backtrack and try to figure out if she'd asked him the same, but no, she hadn't. it makes her feel too warm, hearing it simple and free like that, makes her over aware of the hard thump of her pulse beating away in her throat.

"thanks," she says quietly. "no judging?"

she can hear zayn's smile at the old question as he echoes back, "no judging."


End file.
